With all the things that are constantly happening in our lives, it is easy to lose our perspective in the shuffle. At least it is in my case. There is always something going on (and I am thankful for it) whether it is family related: running from one place to another, from one class to another, or getting the kids ready for whatever the case may be (school, bed, classes, birthday parties, doctor’s appointments, you name it), or work related: jumping from one deadline to another, juggling multiple tasks, putting out fires and spending time coming up with ideas all at the same time, it seems as if our focus is always on the next task at hand or maybe on 1-2 tasks ahead to try and get “ahead of the game”.
It is easy to get lost, easy to lose focus on what matters most, easy to devote all our energy on the tasks at hand right at that moment, and easy to focus only on the accomplishment of the immediate goals. The difficulty lies in learning to take a step back, breathe and enjoy the moments for what they are worth. We spend so much time fighting and arguing with our kids to get them from point A to point B, that many times we fail to enjoy the journey — at least I know I do. And it is only during the calm after the storm, in the late nights after everyone is asleep, when I get to think about our day, or when I turn off the radio or the podcasts during my commute and evaluate our weekends, that I realize I may have missed opportunities to enjoy our kids more. I realize that I have wasted a lot of energy disciplining, redirecting, etc and not enough energy on enjoying the laughing, playing, and loving.
Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about each day goes by so quickly. I know every day needs to be cherished more. I think about how after the clock strikes midnight, we no longer have that day. We can’t get it back. And how because of that finality, we need to make the best of each and every day. Live the day with no regrets. Focus on making each other happy, not sad. Focus on enjoying the moment and cherishing that time together. Focus our energy on filling our minds with positive things; the negatives are a waste. Only 24 hours are given to us each day, and tomorrow is not guaranteed.
And even though I think of this often and we have conversations with our kids about it at the dinner table, I still lose my perspective, I get lost in the tasks of the day, and the checkpoints of life. This is why I need to constantly remind myself to live in the moment. Why I need to imbed this into our family values and daily practices. Why we need to make it a habit, and not just a thought that appears from time to time. we need to constantly regain perspective and refocus on what really matters.
It is worth everything.
some pictures from our weekend.
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Our weekend
As complex as our life has gotten with the addition of two new babies to our family, our lives seem to be full of joy, great times as a family and very fun weekends.
The weather has been amazing in Florida for the past couple of weeks so we love being outside with the kids. They love it too. Our weekend started on Friday night with Nico’s BMX Strider race. The night consists of about 15 minutes of riding their striders in the big track followed by 3 heats by age. The first 2 heats “qualify” them (although everyone moves on) and the 3rd heat is the heat/motto for placement…
Our Saturday began with Nico’s soccer game. This is the second season I coach the U4 team and once again I am loving it! The kids are so sweet and seem to be having a lot of fun with my silly games. Their smiles and hugs are a great reward at the end of every game and every practice. Right here we are “stretching” before our game. Go Chargers!
Soccer was followed by scooters, dress up, bike riding and Dad playing tag with the kids… Well.. it was more like Dad chasing the kids and them singing “you can’t catch me!”…. They love it!
It took us a while to become “beach people”… the amount of stuff we need to take to the beach, the mess in the car and the hassle to get to the beach prevented us to get to the beach in the past but for about 2 years now, we’ve been going to the beach with friends. We try to meet every other Sunday. It is awesome. Not only do the kids absolutely love it, but it is a lot of fun for us too! It has become an opportunity to enjoy the outdoors, enjoy Florida’s weather and beaches, have the kids enjoy time with their friends and us to enjoy time with ours! Is a win-win for everyone. It is the “takes a village” concept in full motion :).
This past weekend was no different. We arrived at the beach around 10:30am and did not leave until almost 4pm! Time flew! And we had some super tired kiddos that night. Mission accomplished.
P.S – we are beginning to master the art of taking 5 kids to the beach. It looks like it will be an insanely fun summer!
Our first family beach day! 8 details that helped us pull it off!
This past week, Nico and Nati were on their spring break, which meant Becca took care of 5 kids by herself most of the week since I had to go to work. To give her a break and get the kids out of the house, we decided to go to the beach! Here is a list of 8 things that made our first beach day as a party of 7 a success!
- Time Flexibility: Although we knew some people would be getting to the beach at 9:30, we did not stress to get there at that time.. Given the fact Emilio and Alejandro had a rough night (and therefore so did Becca and I), we had gone to bed late so we let the kids sleep in. Life with kids does not always work as planned, so being flexible and not sweating the little things help. We believe kids work better in a non-pressured environment. No rush. No stress. No fights. 🙂 The beach will be there no matter what time we show up.
- A full baby is a happy baby.. a hungry baby – not so much! J . Prior to our departure to and from the beach, we made sure the babies were fed (tried to time it around their 3-4 hour schedule). This helped for a much more enjoyable beach day and for quiet car rides. 😉
- Planning what to bring: As simple as it sounds, beach outings require items such as beach chairs, tent, umbrella, change of clothes, snacks, cooler, towels, sand toys among others… it ends up being a ton of stuff, so packing most of the stuff the night before (or at least having a plan of “attack” in the morning) helps for an easier and more efficient morning… This was our first time with 5 kiddos. We had to pack extra for the babies and because we knew we would be at the beach for a while — it’s not worth going through the crazy hassle for just 1 hour of fun. Which brings me to my next point..
- “Plan” how long to stay at the beach: Ha! This sounds easy on paper. As parents we know most of the time things don’t go as planned, hence #1 on the list is very important. But it is good to estimate how long you’ll stay – Will you be there long enough to need lunch? Are you planning on having lunch by the beach? (do you need a change of clothes). In our case, will we be at the beach long enough so the babies would need to be fed again? Having an idea helps you prepare for things to come as the day goes by, when prepared (or semi-prepared) things flow more smoothly.
- Shade, shade, shade (and don’t forget sunscreen): I must admit, I overplanned for shade this time around. I brought a canopy/tent (like this one), a cocoon for the babies to protect them from sand and sun (we have a fisher price version of this item), and a beach umbrella. Becca planned well and applied sunscreen on our other 3 kids and the boys always wear rash guards with SPF to protect them from the sun. Now, Dad is a different story… I forgot to apply sunscreen and paid the price the couple of days after. Dumb move on my part. Plan for shade. The sun is fun, but can also be harmful. Plus it’s good to have a shady spot after being in the sun for a while. Don’t forget sunscreen!
- Keep an eye on the kids and relax: Huh? Yes, it can be done. As long as we know where our kids are at all times, we can relax, have a beer, talk to other adults and chill out. Some parents overprotect their kids and make the outings annoying for their kids and for everyone around them… The kids will be kids, they like to jump waves, make sand holes, run around without being careful, etc etc. We make sure we keep an eye on them, supervise and correct if/when needed and then let them get back to having fun.
- Don’t sweat the sand: Sand will be everywhere. As much as you rinse off by the beach and shake all items prior to putting them back in the car, sand will find its way to be everywhere… It is what it is. I am not going to lie, it took me a while to come to peace with that and I have learned not to sweat it anymore. I have 5 kids… the days of a clean car at all times are long gone (actually not sure if they were ever there J).
- Enjoy the beach and enjoy the kids: We don’t get to go to the beach every day. The beach offers so many cool things you can’t find anywhere else and is such a different “playground” for the kids! Plus, it offers super cool photo ops capturing the kids having a blast with their friends and siblings. We always come back from the beach with fun memories and a TON of pics to prove it (as seen below :)) .
More and more we are becoming comfortable experiencing things as a family of 7- as parents of 5 kids under the age of 6 and as parents of 6 week old twins. We don’t shy away from life. We embrace it. We learn and confirm we can do it! Yes, it is not the easiest and it has its challenges but the rewards and memories make every second worth it.
CHEERS TO LIFE!
OUR WEEK – A BALANCING ACT
Throughout our six years of parenting, we’ve never been a family committed to a “structured routine”. We have been more a “go with the flow” type and that has worked for us. Yes, of course, there is a “loose” routine that we try to adhere to, but we are very flexible since every day brings on new challenges.
With Emi and Ale, things have been more structured, and although we still don’t follow a strict schedule, we do make sure they are doing things like eating and “sleeping” at the same time… otherwise Becca would be feeding a kid every hour on the hour… but that’s a whole other post.
Since Becca’s family left, we’ve been working on returning to our normal routines and making sure everyone is able to participate in their extracurricular activities. Nati attends modern dance, ballet and gymnastics, Nico rides BMX strider every other week (or we try to) and he started his soccer season once again and Dad plays Ultimate Frisbee with the Florida Masters team (33+ years of age).
I am not going to lie.. it has been hard for Becca to haul all 5 kids to dance and gymnastics, but luckily I’ve been able to take off early 2 days of the week so I can attend Nati’s gymnastics and coach Nico’s soccer team. In addition, we juggled this weekend so I could run errands for our business on Saturday morning, and then I headed out to Gainesville for our team’s practice/tryouts… Plus it doesn’t end with just their activities… we then rush home to prep/eat dinner, get lunches ready, do homework, put kids to bed, etc etc.
Last week, Nati was also asked to participate in her school’s Open House event. She and other kids from her kindergarten class showcased a few of the awesome things they’ve learned this year, and some of her art was even featured! She was so proud, and deservingly so.
I mention the above because Becca told me Nati wanted to participate and asked me if we could make it. I said: “If it is important to her and she wants to do it, we’ll make it happen”, and so we did. And we always do. We believe it is important for everyone to be able to do what they want (within reason) and feel the support of the family (all of us).
I know it was hard on Becca this weekend when I left her with all 5 kids so I could go practice (Nico was supposed to come with me but bailed last minute because the weather was crappy… smart man). We knew it would be difficult, but Becca understands how important it is to me and it had been on our calendars for quite some time now. She was a champ and I was SO appreciative of her sacrifice so I could enjoy what I love.
This past week was a great learning week for us. It taught us that although it will not be easy, we can still manage to fit in what everyone loves to do and do it with everyone’s support. Yes, there are sacrifices being made, but that’s what we do for the people we love. After this week we feel ready, very ready. Bring it on life.
This picture sums up the crazyness levels at home. LOL.
Some of our favorite pics from the week/weekend.
NOTE TO SELF: LET THEM BE KIDS.
This weekend I had to remind myself to let my kids be kids….
Sometimes as parents we try to control situations, most of the time for our kids’ safety, but too often we try to control them to make things more convenient for us… avoiding situations that could disrupt our day, cause a little chaos, etc…
On Sunday, we went outside to ride bikes and scooters; however my kids changed their mind and decided they wanted to play in our backyard instead… We have what I think is a pretty cool backyard with a pool, a nice treehouse with a slide, and some swings in the back…a pretty fun area for a kid. My first thoughts were…. “Hmm… if we go back, I am going to have to clean up the swings… also, I may have to go back inside to get mosquito repellent (they get bad at times), this may be a pain….”
After a couple of failed attempts trying to convince the kids to stay out front and ride their bikes, I gave up. We swung for a bit and then went to the treehouse to slide… This meant I had to wipe the slide clean (had to go get Lysol and a towel)…
While the kids played in the treehouse, I took advantage of the time, cracked open a beer and proceeded to clean our pool. Since it needed some water I opened up the hose and dropped it in the pool. This was their queue to play with water!! My first reaction was “Guys, please don’t play with the water– you are going to get wet, we are going to have to get new clothes, you are going to get cold, yadda yadda yadda”… After they were initially careful due to my annoying directions, they later began to be more careless with the water… I caught myself wanting to tell them to stop but then I thought “what the heck!, what’s the worst that can happen?? They get wet. So what?!! Let them be kids. Let them have fun!”
They had a blast! They got soaked! They got a ton of things wet and even ended up without their bottoms on the shallow end of the pool (which is freezing based on my “I am a baby with cold water” standards). I had a great time watching them be kids- they couldn’t stop laughing and played wonderfully together. It was a great wake up call for me to relax and to let the kids be kids. It was a win-win for all of us and an awesome way to spend our Sunday as a family.
Thank you kiddos for continuing to teach me how to be your dad; I love you.
A proud and emotional Dad – Part 1
I am always proud of the amazing individuals my kids are growing up to be. But within a spam of 3 days this past week my kids put me in an emotional rollercoaster that almost brought me to tears – the great kind of tears (I can get very emotional with my kids)…
As seen on previous posts, Nico has had a Strider for about year and a half. Every time we take it for a spin he gets better and more confident. Via email I was notified our local BMX track was hosting a Strider Clinic for kids Nico’s age to ride on the big track! So we planned on attending. After delivering some baby equipment for our business, we headed out to the track with no expectations. We knew he was good at gliding down our driveway but had no idea if he would freak out about the big ramps…. (yikes).
After a quick stretch with the coaches, they taught the kids how to come off the big ramp and take the turns… Probably 10 minutes of clinic… Then up to the ramp where they had set a starting gate!
They informed Nico to put his bike against the gate. “Riders ready?, Set, Go!” And off he went!! No fear! Running and pushing with his cute tiny legs he rolled down the first huge ramp and up the hill, then down another big ramp and on to the turn, to the next, etc…
When he came around with me running around the track cheering him on, he said “I want to go again!!” and off he went back to the starting gate. Amazing. Joy filled my heart. Nico was so happy and felt so accomplished. I could not get the smile off my face… We continued to cheer him on and even after a taking a couple of spills he continued and wanted to ride over and over…. We did that for 1 hour. 🙂
Needless to say, he is getting a Strider BMX jersey for Christmas and we’ll be coming back for clinics and even races!! Can’t wait to see him on the track again. We are so proud and so happy for him. Way to go Nico!
The wheels came off… How we ended up our week…
That’s right, after a fun week that included having the kids at the office, celebrating my mom’s (nona) birthday, spending thanksgiving surrounded by loved ones and even doing some Black Friday Shopping (I know… we thought we were crazy too – shopping with 3 kids and a pregnant mom), the wheels came off on Saturday and Sunday— Nati’s bicycle training wheels that is.
Yes! After pushing it off for so many weekends, we finally committed to making it happen this weekend. Saturday afternoon we decided to take the bikes out to teach Nati how to ride without the assistance of training wheels… This was the first time I had taught someone how to ride a bike, so it was a first for both of us and I had no idea how it was going to go down…
After removing the wheels and adjusting her seat, we started off with me holding the back of her seat. After a couple of rides in front of our house and reminding her to “keep her balance” (which I read after the fact is one of the worst things you can say when trying to teach someone to ride a bike – of course…) we took a break and when we got back into it, I held less onto the seat while helping maneuver the seat to correct her balance…
After a good 20 minutes or so, I was able to let go for a second or two at a time without letting her know about it…. (all while running next to her). Little by little we both got better at it and finally I was able to let go for longer periods of time!
When I was able to let go for probably 5 seconds and then stopped the bike, I was SO happy for her! I got on my knees next to her, high fived her and gave her a huge hug for her awesome accomplishment!! She was so happy. I was so proud. She was so proud. Truthfully, I was probably more excited than she was. 🙂
I still picture that moment. The moment where she smiled back at me and we both realized she now knew how to ride a bike; it will be a moment I will never forget. It was such a great accomplishment for both of us and I will forever cherish those few seconds when we cheered and held each other in celebration.
That moment also reminds me of how awesome and rewarding it is to raise kids. The thought of so many more moments like these with Nati and our other children fills my heart with joy and anticipation for the future.
Nati will be the one that will pave the road for the other kids and the one that will fill our lives with a lot of “firsts”. She is also the one that with her life experiences will teach us how to be better parents and be better prepared for when her siblings experience similar things growing up.
So Thank You, Nati. Thanks for that amazing moment, for the many more moments to come, and for helping us weave through the parenting maze. We love you.
“Me time” is just as important. Weekend Lessons and fun.
This weekend started off rather early for me. I had to do a delivery for a client in Indian Rocks in the morning so I started my day earlier than I wanted to, but it was worth the effort – on my way to pick up the equipment I found a Colombian Bakery and although I did not have time to stop on my way there, I made sure to stop on my way back. Around 10:30am I was back home with some yummy bakery treats for everyone!
The rest of our Saturday got busy doing stuff around the house. We finally got ready and left the house for lunch with the idea to go to Target and let the kids pick what they wanted for their Christmas list for Santa… That plan got interrupted by a lady that was interested in some of the clothes we had for sale from our failed yard sale so we went and met her instead…
At that point, the kids had started to get restless; we needed to find an activity for them or else our afternoon drama would be intense! We needed a playground and we needed it quick! Energy HAD to be burnt! 🙂 Thankfully we remembered there was a playground close to our meeting point so we headed there for a good 45 minutes.. the weather was kind of crappy so we left before we had planned…
Once home, the kids continued to play as Becca and I were trying to finish up stuff around the house… in one instance and after many times of asking the same thing from the kids and frustrated by no one following directions, I snapped… raised my voice and sent everyone to their room – not gonna lie, not my brightest moment… but I felt that my frustration was building for hours!!… Rightfully so, Becca was disappointed at me, we had a small discussion about it and she went up with the kids…. I headed to the kitchen, poured me a single malt and went to my room to practice learning the ukulele…. And while playing is where I learned my lesson…
First of all, I learned I need to work on my patience with the kiddos – sometimes I forget how young they are and I expect too much of them. I honestly need to make a conscious effort about it. I am admitting my issue and going on record so this blog can hold me accountable for my improvement.
The other lesson I learned is that sometimes we need to be “selfish” and spend some “Me time”. Before you judge me, listen up. Just like spending time with the kids is a main priority, spending time as a couple and spending time with yourself is just as important. To be able to be happy and joyful around the kids at all times, one must be happy with themselves and with each other. I really enjoyed taking 1 hour to myself to play and to just “disconnect” for a little. By the time I was done, I had time to reflect on my stupid reaction, I was able to spend time doing something I like to do for myself and was able to get back to my kids and family with a “fresh” new attitude and had a great night thereafter.
So although it is very easy to get consumed by “kid time”, as adults we need to make an effort to work on our relationship with our significant others and ourselves. We need to find a little time to fulfill our happiness as individuals and as a couple. Whether it is time throughout the day or late at night once everyone is asleep, the key is to find the time and make it count. Trust me, it transcends to the relationship with our kids and our home’s harmony.
Our Sunday was a lot of fun, we spent our morning at home being lazy followed by an awesome lunch at a local place that offers my 3 favorite things when wanting to hang out: outdoor eating, live music and beer. The kids had a blast jamming to the tunes played by the band and enjoying the nice Florida sunshine and breeze.
From there we went to a playground to get some exercise and then back home to cook dinner and get ready for the night. By then, we were ALL tired.
Our Yard Sale debacle…and the rest of the weekend.
Sigh… where to start..
I guess, first of all this whole thing went down because since we now know that our twins are boys and we have “closed the shop”, there is no need to keep hanging on to Nati’s clothes.
This led us to look for what we had…. Which led us to find 10 full containers in the attic (always fun getting up there in a hot day… NOT) with clothes ranging from Newborn to 4T. Pants, onesies, jackets, shorts, skirts, shoes, sandals, blankets, warm PJs, light PJs, matching outfits, non-matching outfits, etc, etc, etc…
After a couple of afternoons and nights sorting through all these things and “categorizing” them, we were finally ready – or so we thought. We did not realize we had that much stuff! We had 3 tables full of pants/shorts, another one with shirts and a third one with dresses.. We also had 4 containers full of onesies, pjs, matching outfits and about 50 pairs of shoes/sandals to lay next to the tables.
I know that for most people this may sound like a piece of cake… well, let me tell you, add 3 kids and a missing wife (gone for the day at a school venue prior to pulling the tables out on the driveway) and the whole thing was not that much fun…
But wait there’s more! The day before, Becca and I decided that it would be cute to have the kids sell cupcakes and water to our visitors AND that would keep them busy while I “worked the sales floor”….
So in addition to the whole tables/containers/shoes setup, we also had to setup their sales stand.
And then we waited… and waited… A couple of go-byers here and there… after a lot of sitting around waiting for customers, we realized that our neighborhood did not really cater to young families (the average age in my neighborhood is probably 70 – and that’s because a couple of young families have moved in…:) ) and most of the people that came by were older people looking for home stuff and every now and then for stuff for their grandkids.
We did get some customers and ended selling $100+ but we still have 90% of our stuff!! Now the task continues as we try to sell these things on Facebook groups and consignment stores… sigh… I hope all the time spent on this is all worth it at the end… definitely the time spent and stress associated with this yard sale was NOT! But oh well, we live, we learn…. It was our first and more than likely our last!
P.S – the neighborhood yard sale was the whole weekend.. we woke up early, got ready to make one final push… but… when I stepped out of the house, the streets were dead and no one had set up their yard sales… So, I turned back around and went on with our day.
The “Oh so fun” and “Not so fun” weekend & Coaching.
This past weekend consisted in various fun things (mostly Saturday) and a few “not so fun but need to get done” things (mostly Sunday).
Fun things: End of soccer season with Nico, went to the movies to watch “The Book of Life”, spent time with family.
Not so fun: Had to change the oil in one of the cars, grocery shopping and going through 6/10 containers full of clothes as we get ready for our Neighborhood Yard/Garage sale this coming weekend.
If I had to rank our weekend activities, I would rank Soccer as #1 and going to the movies as #2. Coaching Nico and the 3-4 year old kids was an amazing and rewarding experience that I highly recommend to all parents if they haven’t had the chance to do so. Going into the season I was not planning on coaching but on Day 1 after I voluntarily helped passing the uniforms to the kids, I was asked if I could coach and referee the 3-4 years old game. Thinking this was a one-time deal, I agreed to do it.. The following weekend, I arrived to the fields thinking there would be another coach ready to take on the task but nope, I was asked once again…. Same thing happened on weekend 3… By the 4th weekend, I finally approached the managing staff and made it “official” 🙂 I told them that I could certainly continue to coach the kids on the weekends but it needed to be known among parents and I needed a shirt that made me the “official coach” so parents and kids knew who their coach was and did not appear to be a random dude every weekend…
The more weekends I coached the more I got to know the kids, their strengths, weaknesses, what motivated them, etc and developed a fun coach/player relationship and made it fun for everyone. By the end of the season, it was very rewarding being approached by parents thanking me for coaching their kids and saying things like “the kids love you”. That meant a lot to me and gave me one more reason to continue coaching the kiddos in the upcoming season. The main reason? The amazing time I had with Nico and seeing his proud face knowing that his dad was his “Coach”. Feb. 2015 season, here we come!
The 2nd most fun thing we did over the weekend was watching The Book of Life. I will not go into detail as I don’t want to spoil it for anyone but I HIGHLY recommend it. The colors in the movie are amazing and the soundtrack is great too!! We took all 3 kids (we always do) and they loved it! Santi sometimes is not as interested in the movies and walks around but this time he was very intrigued by the animation and the music and sat through the entire movie! (well, he switched seats a couple of times and ate almost a full bag of popcorn too! :)). So go check it out if you have a chance – the message in the movie is great and worth every penny.
The least fun thing we did over the weekend was start preparing for our yard sale… Given that we will have 2 more boys and we’ve decided we are “Closed for Business” after they arrive, we are now ready to sell/donate all of Nati’s clothes, shoes and toys.. We have a total of 10 bins full of clothes and not to mention all the toys and stuff we’ve been putting aside as we re-arrange the kids’ bedrooms. We only had the patience to go through 6/10 containers and will be tackling the other 4 this week one at a time…. Needless to say, going through her baby stuff brought back a lot of memories of her being a baby (our first) and realizing how much she has grown (and how fast!! :(). Who would’ve thought that preparing to receive 2 new babies could be nostalgic to see the other “babies” grow so quickly? Mixed emotions for sure.
One thing is certain. It has been a pain in the butt getting ready for the yard sale and we’ll be ecstatic once it is over with! 🙂
P.S – Today is 11.11.2014. Thank you to all the men and women that have served our Country to preserve our freedom. We respect you and appreciate you. God Bless America.